Those of you who know me well, know that I have been researching my geneology. I know that I have Italian and Irish as the predominant portions of my heritage, but there is also slavic, Albanian, and other various great cultures in my history.
Recently, it came to my attention that there may also be Scottish. My husband may also have Scottish in his background as well. While I haven't found direct lines and proof, I wanted to capture that heritage and proudly display it.
I have also long felt that I had, maybe not royal blood, but noble blood of some type. I have always had interests that required fastidious etiquette. When I was a child, I was very aware of what the teachers at the private school mentioned. When the other girls heard but ignored the stricture to straightened their skirts under their legs as they sat, I fastidiously not only remembered, but practiced the movement. When the teachers decreed that skirts must "touch" the ground when kneeling, I quickly informed my mother to adjust my skirts so that they exactly touched the ground, while my classmates had skirts that came mid-thigh.
I spent hours and hours on penmenship, because the teacher said that a "true lady" could always be recognized by her "penmenship, the backs of her shoes (as they would never be scruffed), and the way she sat (with just her ankles crossed, not splayed so her panties could be seen)".
I spent time with my grandmothers: learning to cook, crochet, knit, crossstitch, and do other maidenly pursuits. My mother enrolled me in music classes (so I could be entertaining in a proper way?). I dreamt of living in the time just before the civil war, when women wore corsets, and had ladies to assist them into dressing in corsets. I didn't agree with owning slaves, but I saw no problem with having paid servants who were well treated and considered members of the family. I considered my father the king of the house; my mother his queen, and we three children the princesses and prince.
When I babysat for the main family that I cared for, the mother had a copy of Emily Post's Etiquette book (that she had gotten as a gift from her mother in law - I wonder if it was a hint.). Most nights, once the young ones were in bed, I would spend the remaining hours reading that book - learning how to outfit a guest room, the best way to seat a dinner table for guests using name tags, how to write invitations to an afternoon tea. All things that no normal teenager would likely pursue, but I drank it in, like it was mother's milk.
When I did become engaged and marry, I planned the entire wedding myself. All the table settings, the invitations, ordering the "at home" cards, having the thank you notes done within the first month after the wedding. it all felt so very comfortable for me to do it all myself instead of hiring some coordinator. All the things that Emily Post had said must be done, and the way she said it needed to be done. Alas, the man I had married had little interested in behaving as any of the proper men in the Emily Post book. We did have children, but we divorced anyway.
Then I met my current husband, and while he was a diamond in the rough (and still is to some extent), he understands my need to follow courtly ways. My desire to send handwritten notes on heavy paper, written with a fountain pen. My desire to call on friends and leave a calling card, should they not be at home. My need to only entertain when the house is perfectly clean, and ready to support overnight guests should a guest take ill or over enjoy the wine. But it also means that I have very good relations with his family, because I treat them as my own. His mother is my mother. His nieces and nephews, mine. There is no division of his vs. hers that occur in some families.
So this leads to Highland Titles. I truly feel in my heart that I am born of nobility somewhere in my family line. I just haven't found it yet. I researched several title companies, and I wanted one that would grant me not just a piece of paper, but land that I could bequeath to my children. I made a mistake with my first choice. It sounded perfect, but when I asked them what the procedure would be to bequeath the land (for my lawyer's benefit), I was told that while the land was mine, it was only until I died. That didn't sound like I was purchasing land, which was what they said I was doing with their premium package. It sounded like the premium package rented me the land and granted me the title, and the standard package granted me the title only. They agreed quickly to return my money since what I wanted was not what they were selling. I will grant them that. They did not give me any trouble in returning the "land" and "title" that didn't match my needs. It was my misunderstanding of their product.
Another company sold land and title, and the land was large enough on which to build (in some cases, there were already buildings), however, living in the United States, how would I upkeep a building in another country when I have a full-time job still here for at least another 4-5 years before I can retire? That wouldn't do. Plus, the cost of those packages were much more expensive. They also included tickets to some ball. A nice touch, I am sure, to go to a ball where I could meet other Lords, Ladies, Counts, Barons, Dukes, and perhaps even the Queen, but with a child in school, I am not free to travel on short notice at this time.
So, again, I searched, this time, I did not limit myself to British titles. My husband is nearly half British and nearly half Irish, but apparently a few Scots snuck in there somewhere, so he too has Scottish blood. That is when I found HighlandTitles.com. The site was beautiful and much more easy to understand. I quickly found that the land was inheritable to whomever I claimed to be my heir. Land plots come in 4 sizes. Though the land is not authorised for buildings, as I said earlier, I can't maintain a building from here. I immediately felt comfortable buying a plot for myself and my husband. Then realizing that my three children would have trouble sharing two plots, I made a second transaction, getting a plot for each of my children (and the titles that go with them). Now when I die, I will still have a decision to make, which of my children will get my plot. My husband's plot will go to the child we had together. But my plot? I had two children with my first husband.
Maybe I will just wait. Time has a way of showing us the way. Just as time showed me Highland Titles just when I needed it most. My job is tenuous and may well depend on the upcoming election. My parents-in-law are both coming to the closing on their lives quickly. I can see my mother-in-law declining before my eyes. She will not be with me very long, and knowing the devotion he has for her, my father-in-law will not stay long with us once she is gone. Once that happens, it will fall to my husband and his sister to lead the family.
My father passed just two years ago, and I was his eldest. My mother has remarried, so I don't fear losing her soon. But his sister died soon thereafter, and his brother has had heart surgery. Soon, that side of the family will also look to my generation to lead. I am the eldest cousin. I will be looked to as the head of the clan. Having a title won't change what I will do or say.
I am still who I was a few days ago. But having the title changes the way I look at myself. It reminds me of my duties to mankind. I suppose it is like a degree from a university. The day I got my Associates Degree, I was still the person I had been the day before, but the piece of paper documented that I had studied and mastered certain skills. The day I got my Bachelors, I was still the same person, but I now had a piece of paper that indicated to others that I had studied that material. Now, in a few weeks, I will have documentation that will indicate to others that I have spent my lifetime studying how to be a lady. Some may say, "Well, there is a difference, Highland Titles has no proof that you studied one bit how to be a lady." Those people would be 100% correct. Highland Titles has no proof, nor can give any that I am a lady other than that I hold the land.
To that I say, how many people have I met, who have college degrees who obviously had others do their work for them, and cheated their way through school? Also, how many people are born "Ladies"or "Lords" and yet have no idea how to gently treat another person? "The proof is always in the pudding" as my grandmother always used to say. To those who look on what I have done and claim me a fraud, then it must be by the actions I take toward humanity, not because I chose to buy a piece of heavyweight paper. And those who choose to admire me based solely on the piece of paper, they are fools as well, as anyone can purchase heavyweight paper at an office supply store and create an entire kingdom.
Judge me, I ask, not by my name, my title, my degrees, my apparel, or the things I own, but by the way I treat men and women alike. How do I treat the mayor, and how do I treat the poor homeless veteran. Do I give them equal sincerity and honor and dignity? A true lady is named by the way she acts, not by a piece of paper with her name on it, or even a piece of land. This title from Highland Titles reminds me to be humble, to be charitable, to be cognisant of those around me, to do what I can to better their lives, if I can. That is what a title from Highland Titles has done for me. It has reminded me to be a Lady.
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